It’s Friday, it’s summertime, let’s goof around.
We at BCC have noticed, to our chagrin, that we have fallen behind in the navel-gazing that has the rest of the Bloggernacle all a-twitter. Never ones to not jump on a bandwagon as it rolls past, behold! The return of the polls to BCC.
Leave your vote. Remember, God knows when you are telling a lie.
August 26, 2005 at 10:06 am
There are, of course, several others I would have included but whose tender sensibilities I did not want to offend. These people are:
- Kristine HH, whose dinnertime conversation sparkles (and she snorts when she laughs)
- Ronan, who I am sure has a delightful British accent and who would be a cheap date, being used to crappy food
- Jim Faulconer, who actually has great culinary taste and would be fun (assuming he pays)
- Aaron Brown, assuming his wife comes along
- Adam Greenwood, if for the vest alone
- Justin from Mormon Wasp — I have to learn his secret identity
August 26, 2005 at 10:17 am
You left out Rosalynde “Sweet Cheeks” Welch.
August 26, 2005 at 10:20 am
If I win, I really will take someone out to dinner. I will hold a contest.
August 26, 2005 at 10:23 am
Ann– you’re right. I had dinner with her some time ago, and the conversation was scintillating. Of course, she ate with her hands. Normally that wouldn’t have bothered me, except she had a steak. She just gnawed on it like some kind of animal. This is the absolute truth, which she can affirm herself.
August 26, 2005 at 10:33 am
I too would love to learn who Justin is, and figure out where the hell he picked up that crazy last name.
August 26, 2005 at 10:37 am
Randy B.
Justin Butterfield was Joseph Smith’s lawyer in Nauvoo, if I’m not mistaken.
Justin is only half the enigma: who the hell is Dave? He’s my man.
August 26, 2005 at 10:38 am
Ronan, some of us know the True Name of Dave, but have taken an oath not to reveal it.
August 26, 2005 at 10:38 am
And Steve:
I’d take you out for an Indian curry, cheeky man.
August 26, 2005 at 10:39 am
Ronan: so long as it isn’t your native cuisine, we’d have a blast.
August 26, 2005 at 10:42 am
Is it David B. Haight?
August 26, 2005 at 10:44 am
LOL!
I think it would also be fun to have dinner with John Redelfs. Some kind of spicy food, methinks.
August 26, 2005 at 10:46 am
I note with schadenfreude that Nate has yet to get a SINGLE VOTE…
August 26, 2005 at 10:46 am
I don’t think Aaron Brown actually has a wife. I think he’s like Norm off of Cheers.
August 26, 2005 at 10:58 am
Poacher!!
August 26, 2005 at 11:01 am
I vote for a dinner with all the bloggers on Banner of Heaven. If I had to select one, it would come down to Aawrong or Septimus, and I would probably go with Septimus since Aaron hasn’t done his homework yet.
August 26, 2005 at 11:03 am
Ronan,
Why are you taking Steve out for Indian food. After all, he is a millionaire!
August 26, 2005 at 11:04 am
Elisabeth came up with the idea for this poll. All glory to Elisabeth.
August 26, 2005 at 11:13 am
Kris, my millions have yet to arrive in full – but of course with all the money from our lucrative Dialogue deal, we shall all soon fill our coffers with filthy lucre!
August 26, 2005 at 11:35 am
I wouldn’t be caught dead having dinner with any of these filthy reprobates. I don’t think I could even keep down my dinner if I were within 15 feet of them.
August 26, 2005 at 11:54 am
lol about the lucre, Steve.
August 26, 2005 at 12:05 pm
Miranda, I was just citing a comment by Rosalynde on Banner of Heaven (in a reply to a post by Septimus). I wasn’t aware it had a disreputable origin. I thought she was being silly. Rosalynde, my apologies.
August 26, 2005 at 12:08 pm
I would propose a massive pseudonymous festival dinner involving myself, my beautiful wife Serenity Valley, Justin Butterfield, Ned Flanders, Dave, and of course the lovely and talented Prudence McPrude who would certainly be the guest of honor.
August 26, 2005 at 12:20 pm
A bloggersnacktacular! It would be sacrilicious!
August 26, 2005 at 12:27 pm
I would think that after the trading cards were released, fMhLisa would be the #1 indavidual.
August 26, 2005 at 12:39 pm
Ann, Miranda is right about the origin. I called Rosalynde “Sweet Cheeks” on T&S shortly after I began pasting as Arturo Toscanini. Rosalynde was flirting with me, obviously unaware of who I was. The exchange begins here, with comment #5, continues in comments #8 – #12, and culminates in comment #15, wherein I call her “sweet cheeks.” At this point, Rosalynde appears to recognize that she’s been had, and (like most right minded individuals) simply ignores me. I think it’s quite a funny exchange, and I recommend checking it out.
Miranda is, however, wrong about my kind of sleaze. “Sweet cheeks” is indicative of my kind of humor (sophomoric as it may be). The kind of sleaze that I like is entirely different.
Roasted Tomatoes, would Arturo Toscanini be invited?
August 26, 2005 at 12:45 pm
DKL, I haven’t seen Arturo lately and presumed him to be dead. If you’re informing me that dear Mr. Toscanini is in fact alive and well, then he would certainly be invited. In fact, I’m inclined to suggest that he and Sister McPrude might hit it off!
August 26, 2005 at 1:04 pm
Duh. Chronicler of course!
August 26, 2005 at 1:10 pm
The only thing Prudence plans on “hitting … off,” in the event that she is forced to fraternize with DKL, is DKL’s head clean off his shoulders. Hell hath no fury like a righteous woman scorned.
August 26, 2005 at 1:20 pm
“I would only date my wife,” I said virtuously.
But don’t worry about my tender sensibilities. I’ve been washing them daily with Scottish Spring–Soap for Men–and now they’re quite in keeping with the rugged, manly, rest of me.
August 26, 2005 at 1:23 pm
With reference to pseudonyms in the bloggernacle, I have a question. Has anybody ever seen Jordan Fowles and Dan Vogel in the same room together? Jordan purports to have studied German, and everybody knows that Vogel = fowl. Also, Dan is obviously just short for Jordan.
At any rate, I would like to have dinner with the Fowles brothers.
August 26, 2005 at 1:25 pm
I would like to have fondue with the Tanners.
August 26, 2005 at 1:26 pm
Prudence McPrude: The only thing Prudence plans on “hitting … off,” in the event that she is forced to fraternize with DKL, is DKL’s head clean off his shoulders.
Take your best shot, you snotty bitch.
August 26, 2005 at 1:35 pm
My vote would go to eating crackers, sourdough bread, chips, and Italian cheese with the Stapleys, the Johnstons, Adam Brown and Matt Jacobsen.
Oh, wait. I already did.
August 26, 2005 at 1:37 pm
Dear a random John,
You had me at hello. I’d love to go to dinner with you. I thought you’d never ask. Do you have pretty eyes? I bet you have pretty eyes.
It’s been a while since I’ve been on a date, so I might be a little rusty and nervous, but I promise to put on a clean shirt and splash on some cologne.
Pick me up at eight?
Yours,
Sep
August 26, 2005 at 1:39 pm
Amen, Kim.
August 26, 2005 at 1:39 pm
You mock my pain, Steve Evans. Damn that Lou Midgely! Just once, I’d would like enjoy mormonoid fondue with the Tanners without interruption.
August 26, 2005 at 1:39 pm
Probably wouldn’t be a pleasant evening Steve. Most likely Lou Midgley would show up unannounced and rudely interrupt the event.
August 26, 2005 at 1:45 pm
Don’t make me vicariously use my husband’s priesthood power to vaporize you, DKL. When I get sufficiently indignant, I’m like a righteous Emperor Palpatine, flinging electric thunder bolts from my hands to vanquish my foul-mouthed foes.
August 26, 2005 at 1:46 pm
I should have known a DKL response was coming.
Septimus, you’re freaken me out again man.
August 26, 2005 at 1:47 pm
I love it when the perverted minds of the Bloggernacle come together to post identical comments at the same time.
August 26, 2005 at 1:48 pm
Glad I made such an impression on you, Kim Siever, that you remember my first name as “Adam.”
Aaron B
August 26, 2005 at 1:49 pm
That Prudence, was the piece de resistance.
August 26, 2005 at 1:55 pm
;(
No one wants to have dinner with me.
August 26, 2005 at 2:00 pm
I know, D, we should have a support group for nacklites not sufficiently popular to even enter the popularity contest. We could eat dinner at our groups, but it would have to be a hollow symbolic dinner–bland food to mimic our bland social lives.
August 26, 2005 at 2:03 pm
But D., I DID have dinner with you! And Rosalynde was there! And she ate with her hands!
Karen, I was going to list you in the sensitive souls list (see comment No. 1), but figured you weren’t so easily bruised. I guess I was wrong… p.s. check your email.
August 26, 2005 at 2:06 pm
There’s nothing worse than being both sensitive and ignored….*sniff *sniff :o)
Actually, I think that those of us who go AWOL for extended periods of time deserve to be ignored for our bad bad badness. I’m whipping myself with a willow branch as I type.
August 26, 2005 at 2:07 pm
Prudence McPrude: When I get sufficiently indignant, I’m like a righteous Emperor Palpatine, flinging electric thunder bolts from my hands to vanquish my foul-mouthed foes.
WTF?
August 26, 2005 at 2:42 pm
Ann, I’m seriously flattered that you would even mention me, joking though you probably were. No apology necessary for “sweet cheeks”—I think it’s funny, and I only get mad at Dave when he starts shooting his mouth off about feminism. I’m fine with him calling me by insulting and infantilizing pet names.
DKL: You’ve recounted that particular exchange before, and I have to say that your reading of it is sort of … odd. First off, I usually think of flirting as something like,
“You’re hot.”
“No, you’re hot.”
“No, YOU’RE hot.”
“Okay, let’s kiss.”
But fine, if you want to call that flirting, sure. But when AT called me “sweet cheeks,” I most certainly did not back off because I realized I’d been had—I backed off because that was like the creepiest thing that had ever been said to me, online or in real life. Seriously, that was just icky, and I got totally grossed out by it. Later when we knew that you were AT, and you reminded me of the exchange, I thought it was pretty funny. But at the time… yeeps!
Steve: You forgot to mention that it was steak tartare, so there was blood dripping off my chin as I gnawed. As I recall, though, the most embarrassing thing about the evening was that I didn’t have enough cash with me to cover my dinner, so you had spring for me. That’s all right, though, because didn’t we go dutch at Brick Oven that one time?
August 26, 2005 at 2:44 pm
D., you’d be my first choice, absolutely.
August 26, 2005 at 2:50 pm
D. Fletcher, no one wants to have dinner with me either. And I can eat with my hands too. I’m almost as good at it as Rosalynde, except that I don’t order the Brick Oven pasta like she does.
What a total let-down.
August 26, 2005 at 2:54 pm
I fail to see why you wrote “WTF?”, DKL. I mean, since you’re already destined to be banished to Outer Darkness for your sinful snark, you have nothing to lose by using the F-word in all its spelled-out explicitness. Sure, I’d be offended, but your very existence offends all righteous people. You shall one day suffer eternal torment. Prudence, on the other hand, shall inherit unimaginable glory.
August 26, 2005 at 2:59 pm
Aaron, it’s not that you didn’t impress me. It’s that my most recent post impressed me more. ;)
August 26, 2005 at 3:00 pm
Mark # 31–that is a very interesting theory. Even I have never seen the two of them in a room together. . . .
One problem: Vogel means fowl rather than fowls. But I am willing to accept that perhaps Vogel’s ancestors, ashamed at their immigrant status, eliminated the umlaut that would be necessary to render it a plural Vögel.
August 26, 2005 at 3:15 pm
Prudence, I’ve got to go repent. I’ve been idolatrously worshipping you.
August 26, 2005 at 3:26 pm
Mark, #31:
I have never used the pseudonym “Dan Vogel.”
August 26, 2005 at 3:43 pm
There are worse sins than worshipping at the idol of Prudence, RoastedTomatoes. Why don’t you work on those first.
August 26, 2005 at 3:52 pm
“didn’t we go dutch at Brick Oven that one time?”
Rosalynde, you’re probably right. I was (an am) a notorious cheapskate. That’s how I got my first million.
August 26, 2005 at 4:06 pm
Well, that and your whole NueSkinn venture.
August 26, 2005 at 4:18 pm
Jordan, #56:
I have never used the pseudonym “Dan Vogel.”
Can you prove that, Jordan, assuming Jordan is really your name?
The real question is – has Dan Vogel ever posted under the name of Jordan Fowles?
August 26, 2005 at 5:03 pm
Prudence, the only reason I forbore from using profanity was that Steve Evans asked me to watch my potty mouth. It has nothing whatever to do with your artless attempts at humor.
Rosalynde, I did recount the story once on M*. I recounted again it here to annoy Miranda, and because it seems bad form to provide a link to that site from here. At any rate, I’m now laughing even harder over the exchange. I really did think that you desisted because you had found out my childish antics. The idea that you were skeeved out is even more humorous (though I’m not certain why; most chicks are skeeved out by me anyway).
Mark, LOL. I really love your line of questioning. What’s even funnier is that both John and Jordan have seen fit to respond. I’ve met Dan Vogel, and he’s confident enough in his identity that he doesn’t need to come online and declare who he is and is not. (Though, in fairness to your hypothesis, I must admit that neither Jordan and John were present when I met him.)
August 26, 2005 at 5:23 pm
I must admit that neither Jordan and John were present when I met him.
Are you sure?
August 26, 2005 at 5:48 pm
Jordan’s real name is Dan. The “Jor” is an epithet, denoting Dan’s Kryptonite origin.
August 26, 2005 at 6:00 pm
Rosalynde, the more I think about it, the more your idea of flirting strikes me as off the mark. I consider a key component of flirting to be absence of serious intent. You seem to suppose the opposite.
August 26, 2005 at 6:37 pm
I had no idea that Justin B was a pseudonym. Justin seems like such a modern name. I like the idea of a pseudonymous bloggersnacker. We can all wear dark glasses and hats and sit at the back of a dark restaurant.
August 26, 2005 at 7:22 pm
Ronan (no 63) – We should insist upon Jordan’s hyphenation of his first name, with a declaration of origin.
Hence,
Jordan Fowles
becomes
Jor-Dan Vogel of Krypton
August 26, 2005 at 8:18 pm
Oh oh, I just got home and my wife said she has been voting for me the whole day long… Subtract 50 votes. I’ll go out to dinner with her now.
August 26, 2005 at 9:25 pm
No, Wilfried, some of those are from me :)
August 26, 2005 at 9:57 pm
I’m ruined! Steve and Ronan have unmasked my secret identity for the world to see. My life will be forfeit, and the world will no longer have a super hero to save it from imminent doom.
See what happens when you blog?!?
August 26, 2005 at 10:32 pm
Rosalynde, I certainly wasn’t kidding about the nomination, though the nickname was certainly just me being silly (because I thought you were being silly).
D., I have high hopes of a trip to NY for a few days the first week of June, 2006 while DH attends a conference at NYU, and I would LOVE to have dinner if you are still there.
August 26, 2005 at 11:52 pm
Wilfried, I’m just happy to hear that someone in your family reads BCC…
August 27, 2005 at 11:37 am
Why, it would have to be either the lovely Rosalynde or the lovely Jenn from Banner of Heaven (whom I can’t believe is having trouble finding dates, according to one of her posts!)…thank goodness for the pictures of our posters!
August 27, 2005 at 1:11 pm
Indeed, Steve, my family informants (the Strengthening Dad Committee) always provide evening summaries of the best blogs around.
Annegb, I appreciate your votes!
August 27, 2005 at 2:28 pm
Dear Anonymous Coward:
Wow, what a nice thing to say! Thank goodness for pictures, indeed. Although I don’t think of myself as vain, I have found in my 23 years that emphasizing my youth and beauty wins me female friends and male respect, and those, of course, are the main reasons I blog. (By the way, I think oils show me off to even greater advantage that 35mm.)
Please know that you are not alone in your cowardly anonymous admiration, and that I enjoy Olive Garden and Baskin Robbins.
Best,
Rosalynde Welch
August 27, 2005 at 2:36 pm
Rosalynde, you’re too funny. That painting you link to looks like Donald Rumsfeld in drag.
August 27, 2005 at 2:39 pm
Wilfried, I hope that means your current on our content at Banner of Heaven.
August 27, 2005 at 6:29 pm
I am, I am, Miranda.
(Yes, another vote!)
August 28, 2005 at 4:54 pm
Why don’t we have a bloggernacle halloween masquerade party at the Johnston’s house sometime right around halloween?
August 28, 2005 at 7:14 pm
8 votes (3 when you don’t count immediate family members)? Meow.
August 28, 2005 at 7:43 pm
Not to worry Davis. I’m think it’s rigged. The Million Dollar Man won’t be going down this round.
August 28, 2005 at 8:32 pm
Colonel Steve Austin? Nothing can stop him, Eric. But play your cards right and you may do battle with him, like the Sasquatch of yore.
August 29, 2005 at 12:21 am
It’s not rigged so much as flawed.
Anyone can vote as often as they’d like.
August 29, 2005 at 10:44 am
I voted for one of the Davis’s but since only one is single, I was really voting for Davis Bell. However, I am not able to go to restaurants generally. Sonic is my idea of a really good time though. If Steve wins though, I hope I can go in the drawing to win a date with him. Or is it more of a popularity contest where Steve picks the lucky lady? Well, if going to Sonic is his idea of a good time, maybe I have a chance. :)
August 31, 2005 at 4:58 pm
well, shucks, I missed all the fun.
Boo hoo.
I do love a good nacle navel gaze.
August 31, 2005 at 5:02 pm
The Bells are hereby disqualified for cheating – I can see the same IP address voting over fifty times.
September 6, 2005 at 7:37 pm
Steve, I bet you have broken a lot of hearts in your day. Now, you are a dream breaker too. As you know I was not the 50 time cheater as I have no url. I guess I am not cool enough for one of those. Well, I am out of luck going out with one of the Bells. Maybe our date is still on. No? Ah, shucks, you do not know what a good time can be had at Sonic. They have really good cherry lime drinks!
August 26, 2005 at 11:56 am
a random john, thanks for the vote. I’ve had dinner with Septimus more than once, and he does not eat with his hands. Is there anything else in particular that you’d like to know about?
Ann, according to DKL, he gave the “sweet cheeks” label to Rosalynde. Please don’t dignify his type of sleaze by perpetuating it.