Comments on: Police Beat Roundtable #9

By: Steve Evans

Steve Evans — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 23:11:15 +0000

I care, Jason.

By: Jason

Jason — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 22:34:19 +0000

Even later than before (and even less likely anyone cares): I found my personal, yellowed clipping of the printed DU police beat entry for the recycling bin fire this last weekend. It didn’t use the poetical phrase “flame of fire”; it just said “fire.”

PBR is still comic gold, but it might be time for a critical text edition of the DU Police Beat archives. I nominate Royal Skousen.

By: Steve Evans

Steve Evans — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 19:18:03 +0000

Jason, I am very glad to get the insider’s view. I am not sure whether there have been copycat arsons, but yours was the one we discussed. As for the mysterious “shirtless flamer,” I am sure he was just stopping by on his way to the JKHB.

By: Kevin Barney

Kevin Barney — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 19:12:15 +0000

Awesome–we get the aftermath of one of these stories! Thanks for telling the talke, Jason.

By: Jason

Jason — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 19:01:33 +0000

I am a latecomer to this thread, but I was one of the four male individuals rounded up and falsely accused of starting the recycling bin flame of fire. That is, if it was the circa spring 2000 recycling bin fire and not some copycat arson.

It was my first time seeing the justice system at work. And it really did work. Three friends and I saw the fire while leaving the Cannon Center at 2 a.m. We called the police and stuck around to keep an eye on things. (We also took our fair share of photos in the meantime.) Shortly before the police arrived a shirtless student came out from Merrill Hall claiming to have seen the fire from his room (improbable) and wanted to know what the commotion was (there wasn’t any). He pretended to be very sleepy.

The police arrived within 5 minutes and made quick work of the fire. One officer lined up the four male individuals for one-at-a-time PPIs and told us not to talk so we couldn’t get our stories straight. The shirtless dude who I didn’t know said to me, “Don’t tell anyone, but I started the fire!” Very smart move.

I was called in by BYU’s chief of police, who questioned me about whether I self-describe as honest. I said yes, and the interrogation ended when I ID’d the shirtless guy as the perp and repeated his confession. Later, when the BYU police called one of my friends who had a greater sense of loyalty to shirtless flamers, they threatened to make it very difficult for him to accept his pending mission call unless he squealed too. Great tactic.

By: Chad Too

Chad Too — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 19:07:40 +0000

@ Mark B.

I knew I hated the Slaughterhouse cases for more reasons than one!

By: Adam Greenwood

Adam Greenwood — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 16:20:07 +0000

Rich chocolatey goodness! The pudding I mean, not PBR.

I am glad to know that the officer’s search for weapons was only cursory.

By: WillF

WillF — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 04:02:36 +0000

The de Jong Concert Hall has a lobby? I can’t picture where that is anymore for some reason. All I can remember are the fish tanks.

By: Kaimi

Kaimi — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 23:48:06 +0000

We can make an exception for Sumer. But for everyone else:

http://graphjam.com/2008/10/28/song-chart-memes-first-in-the-comments/

By: gst

gst — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 23:21:03 +0000

Mark B., whenever someone jokes about the 9th amendment, I remember John Hart Ely from law school days:

In sophisticated legal circles mentioning the Ninth Amendment is a surefire way to get a laugh. ("What are you planning to rely on to support that argument, Lester, the Ninth Amendment?")