[Note: The following text was taken verbatim from the “M Men-Gleaner Manual, Love, Marriage, and You” used in 1956-1957. Previous entries in this series can be found here.]
Relatives and You
Ted and Joan were married in their early twenties and both thought they would get along well together. They lived in the same city as did their folks on both sides. All the relatives were pleased with the match, the beautiful wedding which was consummated in the Salt Lake Temple and the attractive and pleasant reception which was held in the evening. The couple went on a short honeymoon trip to Sun Valley and returned with confidence and a happy outlook toward the future. And then trouble began. Joan’s mother and father were exceedingly understanding parents who left Ted and Joan to make their own decisions but were interested in all they were doing. Ted’s father was of a similar nature but his mother was entirely different. She pampered Ted as an infant and through childhood. She had dominated and controlled his behavior and particularly his major decisions and choices in life. She even played an important role in his selecting Joan for his wife. After the marriage his mother immediately began to try to control and dominate Ted and Joan and their marriage. She insisted that they live in a certain apartment. She told Ted what to do with his money. She even dictated to Joan how to furnish her apartment and demanded that she cook certain dishes for Ted. She endeavored to control most of their activities. Joan, of course, resented it and Ted soon felt frustrated and like a child in the hands of his mother. The marriage started to “go on the rocks.” Fortunately, Ted was transferred to another city and although his mother insisted that they remain, they left. Their marriage improved “overnight”-as soon as Ted and Joan started to live their own lives.
1. What do you think of Ted’s mother’s behavior?
2. Did this young couple do the right thing in taking a job in another city, away from the mother?