I had the idea to give Saturday’s Warrior the GIF treatment shortly after my BCC debut. Because of the length of the film, it didn’t make sense to summarize the entire plot by way of animations like I did with Johnny Lingo, but I thought surely that corny musical from my childhood could produce at least a handful of worthy “reaction GIFs” instead. AND I WAS RIGHT. So right that I had a hard time paring them down to even two posts.
I can’t hide my residual affection for Saturday’s Warrior, so I won’t even try. I have watched this movie more than any other in my entire life (approximately three times a week from age 4 to 6, and if you think I’m exaggerating ask my poor family). I was obsessed; I pretended Pam was my wise older sister, that I had a younger one in heaven waiting to come to earth, and I had a monumental crush on Elder Kessler. I memorized the lyrics and choreography of the songs I liked and made a ritual of skipping past the ones I didn’t (“Sailing On” and “Didn’t We Love Him?” = FAST FORWARD!) I can still conjure up the exact feeling I got when I first noticed the picture of the Salt Lake City temple in the Flinders’ living room: No one in the movie actually says “Mormon” or “LDS” so I think I didn’t even realize they were a Mormon family until my 20-somethingish viewing. I begged my mom to let me introduce my best friend, Kristen Jordan, a non-member, to its glory. After about a week of my relentless hounding, she finally asked Kristen’s parents how they would feel about it and their answer was an emphatic prohibition. I cried and cried. Suffice it to say, this movie imprinted on me, and I’d be lying by omission if I didn’t admit that I grinned like a maniac rewatching it for the first time in at least 15 years. Grinned and grimaced, but there was decidedly more grinning than grimacing.
One quick aside before we dive into the GIFs: You can’t write about Saturday’s Warrior without mentioning the false doctrine that imbues its 115 minute runtime. The two most egregious examples I noted:
1) The movie makes it seem as though bare shoulders are allowed in heaven, and
2) All the characters’ names are the same in pre-mortal life as they are on earth. Aside from what this says about agency, I simply refuse to believe that there are spirits in the pre-existence named Payzlee and Traigyn.
On with the show? Yippee!
Lighten up any online abortion debate by sharing one of the following two GIFs in the comments section!
^ For those uninitiated, Emily is reminding Jimmy about that one time he promised to make his parents conceive her. Not sure exactly how he managed it, but (spoiler alert) he did! One more on this topic for good measure:
More GIFs to come; my computer is too slow to deal with them all in one post. Until then…