One of my most popular posts ever was a Mormon version of Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary, a satirical version of definitions of words according to Mormon culture.  I thought it was time to expand that first effort. I’ve included original definitions, a few reader suggestions, and added to the list with some more of my own. With this preamble, I bring you Mormon Jargon the Sequel: 2 Mormon 2 Jargon.
The Collect: Heavenly Father, who through Thy Son hast led Thy Chosen People into many wildernesses with the promise that they will blossom as the rose, make us pioneers willing to crucify our old self in Christ’s death to find life with Him in that Undiscovered Country that is Thy Kingdom so that we may then speak peace to those in fear, strengthen the weak hands and confirm the feeble knees, through Thy Son Jesus Christ, who reigns with Thee in Thy Kingdom, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. [Read more...]
This installment: Karen is hopped up on goofballs, and we are visited by the lamest of the Three Nephites.
Steve: GST, apparently Karen is drunk on cold medicine. And she’s not even sick!
GST: I like how she parties
Karen: Hi Greg. I’m Karen and I take cold medicine.
GST: Yeeesss [Read more...]
Despite recent calls to ‘hasten the work’, the church does not seem to be growing in the UK. While there may be pockets of growth, on average, it seems like the number of people baptized is not growing when contrasted with the attrition we are also observing. What is particularly striking is that the absolute growth in membership is substantially lower than what we would have expected if we just followed the increase in membership due to baptisms. This implies that we are both failing to convert new people and appear to be losing some of those who were already members. These statistics do not tell us why this might be happening; it could be due to emigration, death, or resignation. All of these are important but I suspect that there has been at least a small uptick in the number of resignations per year over the last 5 years. Since 2000 the church has not been growing in the UK and this seems unlikely to change in the near future. Taken together, the future looks pretty dim.
All of this is worrying but there is something else that, for me at least, is of greater concern. [Read more...]
Over the past year, I’ve become aware of something which I wonder might be a new trend, or at least a new understanding, abroad in the American church. Specifically, I have seen missionaries (invariably elders; none of my examples involve sisters) returning from their missions early, never (or at least never explicitly) for reasons of disobedience or financial obligations or sin, but rather for reasons of stress, or stomach-aches, or homesickness, or a fear of losing their testimony, or anxiety, or anger management issues arising from conflicts with companions, or depression, or headaches, or some combination of all of the above. I am not in any way disparaging any of those reasons for returning from one’s mission; every one of the half-dozen or so cases I know of personally–and all of those I’ve learned about from others, of which there seem to be many–involve genuine struggle and legitimate concerns, and I have a lot of sympathy for the hard choices these former missionaries (a few of whom being young men I’ve known for years) have had to make. But still, I’ve seen these boys return, and attend church and receive callings and make plans for college or finding jobs or going on dates or returning to the mission field (though that option, while always spoken of, has never actually been taken by any of the ex-elders I’m thinking of), all without dealing with any church discipline or any kind of medical supervision or really from any real social costs that I’m able to see, and I think to myself: man, times have changed. [Read more...]
Miranda Wilcox is an associate professor of English at Brigham Young University where she teaches medieval literature and researches the religious culture of Anglo-Saxon England. She is co-editor, along with John D. Young, of the recent compilation Standing Apart: Mormon Historical Consciousness and the Concept of Apostasy.
This interdisciplinary collection brings together fourteen essays that explore the relationship between the development of Mormon historical consciousness and one of the central tenets of Mormonism—the concept of a universal Christian apostasy from its apostolic origins. [Read more...]
Each summer for the past seventeen years or so Richard Bushman and Terryl Givens have gathered a number of young scholars together to take part in a research seminar on Mormon culture. Bushman and Givens have both benefited greatly from the gatherings—Bushman’s Rough Stone Rolling and Givens’s forthcoming Wrestling the Angel were informed by seminar research—but I think the primary beneficiaries have been the participants (myself among them). Now that I work at the Maxwell Institute where the annual gatherings are currently held it’s been a real treat to get to know some of the participants and to reflect back on the great time I had in 2010.
This year the seminar is being directed by Claudia and Richard Bushman. The theme is “The History of the Mormon Family,” which they outlined here. A symposium featuring papers written by this year’s participants is being held this week on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday at BYU. (More info is available here.)
If you happen to be in Provo you might stop in and say hello.
The only aspect of this post I can take credit for is providing the photo which catalyzed a side-splitting bit of fun in the BCC permas (current and emeritus) Facebook group today.
I snapped this on my way into Sacrament meeting this morning. It was only my fourth week attending my new ward and the first time in my life I’ve ever seen reserved stake presidency parking. I shared the image, asked “Is this a thing?”, noted that the stake Relief Society presidency’s reserved spots were conspicuously absent, and then the fun began. [Read more...]
As I walked in to sacrament meeting this morning, I was greeted at the chapel doors by a beaming young girl from Primary, who I would guess is maybe 8 or 9 years old. She smiled broadly, handed me a program and shook my hand as I entered the chapel. [Read more...]
I gave this talk last week. Sorry you couldn’t be there? Guess what! I’m gonna post up the whole thing for you to read. Enjoy. It was a short talk.
Today we’re going to talk to you about hope. I’m excited to talk about hope, because that means obviously I get to talk a lot about President Barack Obama, who is a very popular figure and an obvious inspiration to us. I’m just kidding folks, relax. 
No, specifically I want to talk about how we can gain hope in our lives, how do we get hope. But I also want to talk about how hope impacts our view of the world, how our perception of life changes when we are hopeful. [Read more...]
The 2015 Faith and Knowledge Conference will be held at the University of Virginia, Charlottesville, VA, February 27-28, 2015. [Read more...]
As a seven year old, I had a fascination with monster/horror/space films. When my parents weren’t looking, I would leaf through the newspaper to find the page where the theaters advertised their current wares. Inevitably, there were some wonderfully creepy black and white ads leaking out of the bottom of the page: “Blood Monster from Hell” or “The Blob,” or some such. Stuff they never discussed in Primary. When my mother was out of earshot, I’d mention these to my dad, who, knowing better, shared a bit of this interest, or at least he pretended to share it. My mother was one of those practical people who never opened the door to the night.
Most of us recently had lesson 24 in this year’s Old Testament Sunday School curriculum. The main topic of discussion is the story of David and Bathsheba, but an enrichment section at the back of the manual suggests talking about the story of Amnon and Tamar from 2 Samuel 13. In characterizing this story, the manual summarizes: ” 2 Samuel 13 contains the story of David’s son Amnon and David’s daughter Tamar. Amnon was attracted to Tamar and forced her to commit fornication with him.” (Emphasis added) It seems to me that our nameless, faceless, anonymous curriculum committee writers have done Tamar a grave disservice with this formulation. [Read more...]
Today we mourn the devastating and sudden loss of Jordan Fowles, brother of our own John and old friend of the Bloggernacle. We send our love and fellowship to his family at this time and pray most fervently for Andrea and for his children.
There will be time later to write Jordan the eulogy he deserves. In the meantime, the following from Goethe seems appropriate, especially as it was one of his favourites:
Über allen Gipfeln
In allen Wipfeln
Kaum einen Hauch;
Die Vögelein schweigen in Walde.
Warte nur, balde
Ruhest du auch.
Over all the hilltops
In all the treetops
hardly a breath of air.
The little birds fall silent in the woods.
Just wait… soon
you’ll also be at rest.
Please share your memories of Jordan in the comments below.
Kristine A returns to share with us her thoughts about why Rexburg is home to the best ward in the world.
Last week I was strolling around my neighborhood near dusk and ran into a friendly neighbor, let’s call him “Bro. Smith”. As we visited I shared that my husband and I were building a home 5 blocks away (.5 mile and 2 wards away, in Rexburg measurements) and we’d be moving in a few months. Bro. Smith mentioned how sad it was we had to leave our ward, but at least we were staying in the best stake.
He went on to share that when “Bro. Young” from our ward was Stake President, Elder Packer came up to Rexburg and in confidence with Pres. Young, told him the our Rexburg Stake was THE literal best stake in the Church. [Read more...]
Please make sure that the membership software prompts a ward clerk to ask recently-married women about their preference for their surname. It’s 2014. [Read more...]
“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” Shakespeare wrote that in All’s Well That Ends Well. Is being trusting a virtue or evidence of lack of discernment? Are Mormons more gullible (as is often asserted or at least implied) than the average person? [Read more...]
…wrote no one, ever.
In my article “On Elkenah as Canaanite El” I made an argument for understanding the idolatrous god “Elkenah” from the Book of Abraham as the Canaanite deity El. Part of my argument was linguistic, suggesting that the -kenah element of the name could = Canaan. This looks counterintuitive at first, but the usage in cuneiform texts from Tell El Amarna and Bogazkoy demonstrates that the second n in Hebrew kena’an is an affixational morpheme, not part of the name itself. So while letters originating in Canaan itself (Tyre and Byblos) use the second n, those originating in Syria or Mesopotamia do not (resulting in the normalized form kinahh-). I also point to sources that report that Phoenicia was formerly called Chna (Greek chi-nu-alpha), which appears to represent a continuity with the earlier cuneiform form of the name. [Read more...]
Craig Harline, a BYU professor of European history and fairly prolific author (by my standards, anyway) as well as the presenter of a speech on how religions and cultures change that every informed person ought to listen to, has written a beautiful, hilarious, and haunting book. Titled Way Below the Angels: The Pretty Clearly Troubled but Not Even Close to Tragic Confessions of a Real Live Mormon Missionary, you may have caught a couple of glimpses of it a while ago on Times and Seasons. It is a mission memoir, one that Harline states he’d wanted to write for many years, but didn’t really feel like he could until nearly 40 years had passed since his mid-70s sojourn in the short-lived Belgium Antwerp Mission (opened in 1975, closed in 1982, later re-opened as part of the Belgium/Netherlands Mission). The reflective wisdom and writing skill which he’s developed over those decades is very much on display in this book; it’s the best, most thoughtful, funniest and truest recreation of missionary life–especially the internal life of a missionary–that I’ve ever read. [Read more...]
If you haven’t had a chance yet to dig in to the new books from Adam Miller (Letters to a Young Mormon) Joe Spencer (For Zion: A Theology of Hope) or David Bokovoy (Authoring the Old Testament) you have a perfect chance this week to become more familiar with their authors. On Wednesday night, ZION’S BOOKS in Provo is hosting a roundtable discussion featuring Miller, Spencer, and Bokovoy. Each author will deliver a brief lecture on the relevance of scripture followed by an audience Q&A. Janiece Johnson (BYU-Idaho) will moderate the discussion. You can pick up copies of their books and get autographs and enjoy some free light refreshments and give me a hard time for using this blog post for promotional purposes.
But if I were you, I’d want to know about this, too. So would this guy: [Read more...]
A little over two years ago I did a post titled “Die Boek van Mormon” in which I reacted to a story from John Pontius about how one Felix Mynhardt translated the Book of Mormon into the Afrikaans language. The story recounted as a faith promoting aspect of this that he translated the text from English first into Ancient Egyptian, and then from there into Afrikaans, and the text was obviously an Egyptian document, or something like that. I took the view that that was ridiculous, that no linguist worth his salt would actually approach a translation project that way, that there would be no virtue or benefit to creating an intermediate translation like that rather than just translating directly from the English ur-text into Afrikaans. [Read more...]
Collect: We thank thee, O God, for the Prophet Joseph Smith Jr., who opened the heavens with his simple faith, and opens our minds that we should do likewise. Grant us, therefore, grace in Christ, that we may ask of thee, seek, and knock, as Joseph did, in faith believing that we may receive through the liberality of thy Holy Spirit, Amen.
Late in the afternoon on this date, exactly 170 years ago, a mob stormed the second story chamber of the small jail at Carthage, Illinois, and killed Joseph Smith Jr., the founder of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and his older brother Hyrum. John Taylor, who was also present and wounded in the attack, eulogized him in print shortly afterwards: [Read more...]
. . . our determination is that you be excommunicated for conduct contrary to the laws and order of the Church.
In Church, and in Church-related discussions, I often hear people differentiate Church policies from doctrine. Policies, they say, can (and not infrequently do) change; doctrine, on the other hand, cannot. It has never changed and will never change.
These doctrine-vs.-policy discussions are rarely satisfying, in my experience. We argue over whether we’re talking about doctrine or policy, but rarely make it any further. And in part, I believe, the impediment is that we don’t really have a clear sense of what we’re talking about when we say “doctrine.” [Read more...]