Reasoning with your spouse

Last night the wife and I got into a little tussle, as I tried patiently to explain to her the law of divine marriage. She was naturally a little upset that I’d already taken several spiritual wives, but I was shocked, and a little taken aback, that she was so unwilling to accept the restored gospel.

Anyone else out there have this problem? What do you do to preside righteously in your home in such a situation?


  1. April fools!

  2. Fair point Kaimi. But I already see marriage as a kind of mission call, so the idea of a transfer isn’t completely foreign. In fact… wasn’t there something like this in Raising Arizona?

  3. Good point again, Kaimi. Perhaps this is simply one of the many challenges us men must face while presiding in our homes. I shall remind Sumer of this during our next comp study… I mean, FHE.

    I certainly believe in following the examples of earlier leaders of the Church. The added benefit of the modern practice is that prosecutions for “cohabitation” are much less likely.

  4. Hey — wait a minute, who switched back our motto??

  5. Hey, if each day is a thousand years or whatever, perhaps today is April Fools Day to God — it would explain a lot over the last 1,000 years.

  6. I think the solution is to follow the prophet’s example. What did Joseph do?

    1. Don’t tell Emma. What she doesn’t know, won’t hurt her.
    2. If she suspects, or finds out, Deny Deny Deny!
    3. Marry all of her closest friends; that way, you’ll know what she’s up to.

    If it worked for Joseph, it can work for you too.

  7. I would be like Emma…the most bitter enemy to the teenage “housekeeper”…I’d threaten her with a knife too.

    How else to deal with this issue in my house?

    If you don’t shape up buddy, you ain’t gonna make it to the CK and the Lord will assign me to Jeff Holland.

  8. I’m just glad that I don’t have any stairs. That way, Sumer can’t push any of my “friends” down them.

  9. Polygamy — the joke that keeps us laughing over a century later. Stop, Joseph, my sides are aching!

  10. Steve said:
    “I certainly believe in following the examples of earlier leaders of the Church. The added benefit of the modern practice is that prosecutions for “cohabitation” are much less likely.”

    Yeah, Steve, but the statutory rape laws might preclude your following their examples to the letter. Sorry.

    Aaron B

  11. Steve,

    You had better be careful making April Fools jokes about polygamy. Remember, many of the first plural wives were already married to other people, but were then reassigned by church leaders. You wouldn’t want the Bishop calling you up to say, “I have a new, er, calling for your wife . . .”

  12. That’s exactly how we deal with the problem of spiritual wives in MY house. I have spiritual husbands, too! It works great…one makes a great living, another is great with the kids, the third is handy with home remodeling projects and the fourth…well, lets just say that if momma ain’t happy, nobody’s happy.

  13. This is a notice from the FEDERAL GOVERNMENT.

    You must stop practicing plural marriage, or your blog will not be admitted to the internet. Soldiers will come and sieze your computer.

    This will cease onl if you renounce your principle. You may do this through a manifesto. We expect that you will stop marrying any more people no later than 14 years after issuing your manifesto, and/or at the time of issuance of any “second manifesto.”

    Inquiries on this action may be sent to Mr. Tucker Edmonds, c/o the Federal Government.

  14. yee-ikes! Aaron, I am falling out of my chair.

    I am also weeping deep tears for the early church members at whose expense this lame post was created.

  15. Yes, but she can still toss them out the window, right?