Call me morbid, call me pale. I’ve spent 6 long years planning my funeral fare.
My grandmother, the great organist, died last year and her funeral was an amazing concert. A couple of cousins played the organ. One cousin played the piano piece that wooed my grandfather into marrying her. A few arias were sung.
I want Oh Divine Redeemer. And maybe something from Brahm’s Requiem. Could I have a whole choir sing something from Mozart’s requiem? That may be too self indulgent. I am in love with someone who plays the banjo so I’d like some banjo music, maybe a quartet–a bass, a fiddle, a guitar and a banjo. I like a number of old spirituals and could be persuaded by some gospel music as well. My funeral must have 5-6 spectacular musical numbers.
The night before, since this would be inappropriate for a church, I want a some indie rock band doing a show in remembrance of me. A local band that I am fond of would be fine. I would also allow for a bigger band than a little indie rock band, say, the Pixies or Radiohead.
I am still undecided on the open mic-ness of my funeral. My grandfather had a simple graveside service and we all told stories about him, a testimony meeting of sorts. I liked that. I don’t want sermonizing or a preacher. I just want stories. About how funny I am, or bumbling, or creative, or flaky. I want stories about how people loved me, or when they sometimes hated me. My godliness and my worldliness. There would have to be a time limit however, especially with all the musical numbers, and Mormons. Give them a mic and sometimes they can talk forever.
Everyone should come with a new article of clothing from a thrift store. It doesn’t need to be outlandish or ugly like most of my clothes but something from a thrift store. To commemorate my life of thrift store service.
I also want funeral favors. I am famous among my friends for self-absorbed birthday party favors. One year, t-shirts saying I heart Amri. Another year at my Asian themed birthday party, it was magnets. I Rove Amli. I’m thinking bumper stickers or pencils as the funeral favor.
I like flowers but am also for having people donate to favorite charities. I like people getting together to eat afterwards too. Funeral potatoes are quite nice especially if you can add sweet potatoes.
I would like to be cremated. I just heard on NPR on Saturday that they have new huggable urns. I could record my voice and when you hug the urn it would speak, saying: you feel guilty now for being mean to Amri, don’t you? or I’m sorry if you don’t go to heaven like me.
Has anyone else planned their own funeral? Is it morbid? What’s most important to you when people remember you at your funeral? And what do you hate about funerals? Should funerals be planned for the deceased or for the living? Should they indulge Amri or those she leaves behind? Any ideas for a better funeral favor? I’m open to suggestions.