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After last week’s excitement, we felt that a quick turnaround was needed to keep the children happy before Christmas, and a bonus Zeitcast/Poll Combination should do the trick. In this edition, Scott B. and Cynthia L. sever ties with Tiger Woods before discussing Stake Christmas concerts and engaging moral dilemmas about shopping on Sunday, babysitting, and cooking with alcohol. Cynthia then sets forth judgment on the Bloggernacle’s status as a full tithe payer.
Links for your convenience, as well as the poll, below the jump.
1. Accenture drops Tiger Woods
2. All about Sherry
3. Does Alcohol burn off during cooking? [UPDATE: Better data in comment #6 below]
4. A Brief History of Zeitcast Failures
5. The source of the musical mojo
Aerial View of SB2's Stake Christmas Concert
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By Common Consent, a Mormon Blog 
Thanks for the information about alcohol and cooking. I steadfastly refuse to have food that is prepared with alcohol (my maiden name is Hazelwood — think Exxon Valdez — alcohol and my genetics do not mix well). I have always been told the alcohol burns right off. Now I have some evidence to the contrary
You are very welcome, StillConfused. We here at BCC aim for that elusive niche of faithful public service announcements.
For me the zeitcast ends abruptly at 13 minutes, with Cynthia still playing oinologist and trying out for Sideways II. Am I the only one who can’t hear the whole thing?
(My dad always wanted to cook with wine, making the argument that the alcohol cooks out of it; my mom would never let him.)
Strange, Kevin. It seems to be working fine for me. I’ll set up a link in the OP so you can download the file and listen.
[Okay, try that now.]
It worked all the way through that time; thanks.
I’m enjoying the zeitcast reboot.
Here is the USDA data (PDF – see pg. 12).
Thanks Kevin. Thanks also for the data link, Stapley.
That music makes me thankful for the old woman who sings O Holy Night in my parent’s ward every year. Up until 30 minutes ago, I had cringed just imagining her singing, but you have made me a more charitable person.
For the record, you chill white wine…
Here’s How…
http://www.sutree.com/howto.aspx?from=rss&s=29515
Oh no you didn’t start with *that* recording of O Holy Night.
My Wife is wondering if the Garlic Herb Wine Marinade Powder she used on dinner cooks out? I love her anyway.
Ariel (8.) & Ben Pratt (10.)–
I hope you listened to the whole ZC, and thus got your _full_ helping of O Holy Crap.
I see we have learned several important lessons today:
(1) According to the poll, I am not going to burn for shopping Amazon on Sunday (though I didn’t end up doing it)
(2) I am going to burn for cooking with wine, because the alcohol doesn’t burn off as advertised
(3) I may not burn for #2 because, by keeping open wine in the fridge for up to 2 months, I am actually cooking with vinegar, not wine. (a helpful friend informs me that open wine doesn’t keep more than a day or so)
(4) Our sitter was only in danger of drinking vinegar (see #3) (PHEW!!!!! People, you do not understand how sincerely horrible I felt about that)
“Seasoned baking soda.” Awesome.
Cynthia, I’m so glad to hear the whole bottle of wine story. I actually got a taste of it when you told it to Scott. Also, noting your point 4 in #13, I’m glad you’re not providing alcohol to minors.
Am I the only one who thinks the guy singing sounds like a terrible, terrible version of Brak? Am I the only one willing to admit to knowing how Brak’s singing sounds? Come to think of it, the guy who voices Brak (apparently named Andy Merrill) could probably do this intentionally.
Ben,
If Steve were around this evening, I’m sure he’d dole out 5 bonus points for knowing who Brak is, and 10 points for knowing what Brak sounds like when he sings.
I’m driving down highway 40 in my big old pickup truck.
Scott, *of course* it’s about not making people work on Sunday. Why would it be about spending money? (Deuteronomy 5:14) We don’t mind paying tithing on Sunday, after all, or having the ward clerk deposit the money in the dropbox at the bank.
Oh no you didn’t start with *that* recording of O Holy Night.
Surely then this is an apostate zeitcast!
Cynthia, I’m surprised and, quite frankly, dismayed at your blatant indulgence in cafeteria Mormonism. Next time you invite my kids for a sleepover the answer will be a vehement NO. (Zoo trips are also verboten.)
But Kristine, nothing is being purchased with our tithing and offerings on that day…surely there is a difference between donating and purchasing, right? C’mon–SB2’s salvation is at stake here.
+5 pts for Brak. Would have been +50 had there been a link to the theme song to The Brak Show.
Cynthia L. (13),
If you want to get back to cooking with wine and not vinegar, here’s what you do: cook with whatever amount of wine you’re going to cook with. Then put the rest of the bottle into ice cube trays (usually what’s left after a new bottle for me is about two trays). Freeze. Then, when you need wine for a sauce, take out a couple wine cubes and stick them in the pan. The cubes are kind of slushy, but are frozen, and work great in sauces.
(I wish I’d come up with this myself, but I learned this listening to and interview with a wine importer on KCRW’s Good Food.)
Scott, that’s true, but the problem isn’t a monetary transaction, or getting something, it’s laboring (or causing your manservant or maidservant to labor), right? That’s why eating food prepared by your family, as a gift, is ok, and eating food prepared in a restaurant, by people who are doing it as a job, for money, is not ok. The food you eat, whether at home or in a restaurant, is worth something–you are consuming–but that’s not where the violation of the Sabbath lies.
But Kristine, if the maidservant is only paid room and board, how is that different from mom’s home cookin’?
So, the following would then be a-okay, if I follow you correctly:
-Online purchases
-Vending machines
-Self-serve gasoline (but not full service)
-Automated car washes
-buying treats at the grocery store, as long as i use the self-check out (important the subtlety here–if i use a broader term like “grocery shopping” then we’re out of bounds, because that could be construed as laboring–the weekly chores)
and the list goes on.
The point to me is that all of those things above–except in very rare circumstances–would be considered “running errands” that coulda/shoulda been done prior to Sunday.
But, then again, I am risk-averse in this sort of thing. I don’t want to burn. Like Cynthia.
Nope, Scott–self-serve gasoline requires you to work to fill the tank, someone to keep the station open, etc. Same with grocery shopping. I contend, though, that it’s the WORK involved with purchasing, not the exchange of money that is a problem. If you’d be ok with baking treats or making a present for someone on Sunday, then the lesser effort required to purchase those treats or presents online could fall into the category of allowable good works.
I think I’m going to alter the poll to include Kristine in those who need to be judged. You’re going _down_, Haglund.
Incidentally, I am also risk averse. I would not make a habit of any of the things you list, and I was annoyed that Sunstone did their big fundraising push on a Sunday precisely because it felt wrong for the Sabbath, somehow, but I don’t think there’s an applicable letter-of-the-law condemnation (except Nehemiah 10? but even there, I suspect it’s because in the context of the time, commerce without work was inconceivable).
“You’re going _down_, Haglund.”
No doubt. But probably not for this :)
Scott, I think you are missing the point: hire a Shabbes Goy.
Since the Word of Wisdom speaks of strong “drinks”, I think you’re safe so long as you don’t drink your food. For the broken jaw set–food pureed and drunk through a straw–you better leave the alcohol out until you’re healed.
Mark B., you’re in good company with David O. McKay on that one.
Its times like this when I wish I had a seventh-day adventist friend to run my sunday errands for me. I’d be willing to do the same for him on Saturdays in exchange. No sabbath broken=no going to hell.
You guys touched on the Stake Christmas Music Programs, and I was interested in Scott’s comment that if something is done too well, somebody’s going to criticize the allocation of resources.
I was involved in Cynthia’s stake production (I’m pretty sure, anyway), and it was definitely a big deal. The effort expended was incredible and I feel a lot of love for those who worked so hard to create such an amazing program. It was definitely good to bring friends to, but likely too big to do two weekends in a row.
However, I’m also in a ward choir and I know that the stake program has negatively impacted the quality of our upcoming Christmas Sacrament Mtg. program, a meeting which generally attracts a lot of those who aren’t often there. Being in the bishopric, I feel that Sacrament Mtg. is a big priority — after all, it’s the Lord’s Supper.
My head rings with the compliments and expressions of appreciation voiced in one ear, and the frustrations and criticisms expressed in the other. Sometimes it’s very hard to tell good from better.
By the way the embedded player also stopped for me halfway through. I was sure it was another zeitfail until I downloaded the mp3 and got to listen through to the end. And what a painful ending it was.
“Somebody left a cake out in the rain. Oh noooo! I was going to eat that cake, but now it’s all wet and I don’t think I want any!”
Brilliant.
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQ_mVruRS6U&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0]
On this Sabbath stuff: you are all INSANE.
For the record, you chill white wine…
Here’s How…
http://www.sutree.com/howto.aspx?from=rss&s=29515
Matt W., the video didn’t work. I always keep a bottle of chardonnay in the fridge for the in-laws. My mother-in-law doesn’t care about the 30-minute rule. She likes her wine cold.
The chardonnay in the fridge also help ward off stake visitors and repels bishopric members equally well. When that fails, a trail of beer cans on the front walk way works nicely.
When Reed and I were dating at BYU he worked at Club DV8 for a while. His roommate’s girlfriend owned the place and she’d let us take the empty gallon-size liquor bottles home. They make awesome water bottles–we’d fill them up and keep them in the fridge and have a constant supply of supercold water that tasted just the tiniest bit of gin.
Problematic, though, when the bishopric stopped by.
p.s. We never drank the tainted water on Sundays.
Ben Pratt (37.),
-10 points for that video.
Martin (35.),
I certainly hope your Sacrament meeting isn’t diminished by the Stake’s production–to be honest, I don’t really see the connection between the two regarding who I am inviting to one vs. to the other; one is for community and (let’s be honest here) entertainment, and the other is for worship. That said, I am not a big fan of showy productions in the Church for a couple of reasons–one being the misallocation of resources, the other being that productions are usually (in my experience) lower quality and I’m a snob like that.*
*Except in your ward/stake, Kristine, which I understand is phenom…
Sam,
Great idea with the ice cubes; and as a bonus, you can also use them to chill your sangria.
The disclaimer wasn’t necessary, Scott. I’m saving up a post about why the Messiah Sing-Along is not just bad, but actually evil.
Scott, I assume he meant that the finite number of singing-oriented people in the stake spent so much time and energy preparing for the stake musical event choir, that ward choirs all scaled back their Christmas Sacrament Meeting plans. I like very simple Christmas Sacrament Meetings, so I don’t see that as (necessarily) a really bad thing. When there are too many choir numbers in Sacrament Meeting, I find myself getting irked that they’re singing all my favorite songs and hogging the fun of singing it to themselves. Let them all be congregational, sez I.
Kristine,
For unto us that choir is awful…
Kristine, I committed great evil this past Sunday.
Cynthia, I’m with you. I like lots of congregational singing at Christmas time.
#37: I wanna hear that “O Holy Night” guy sing “MacArthur Park.” Now THAT would be a classic.
Kristine,
this example is a bit baffling. How does kicking off an online fundraising campaign for a charitable donation drive fall outside of your otherwise acceptable conditions? It is considerably less questionable than online retail shopping. Nobody is working, the effort is no more than an online checkout, and it’s a good cause.
In fact, if anyone is interested in seeing just how easy the process is, click on my name. Not only is the process easy, it feels good, It can happen any day of the week, and it’s tax deductible! :-)
Kind of like an escort service is Sunstone!
Scott B:
Sort of, yeah. But if you’ve figured out how to deduct those services from your taxes, I’d like the name of your accountant!
#40 – problem solved
My mother was a convert from SLC who married an engineer from Grantsville in NYC. She traveled to New York from SLC to marry. Soon after they were married, the bishop (or maybe in 1930 in New York, the branch president) came for a visit. My mother offered him a glass of wine for refreshment. He was so flustered he drank it. My father was so nervous he did not mention it and only much later recounted the story.
Left Field (#49): exactly!
Scott, sorry about the goofy lip-syncing dude. I just wanted the audio.
Kristine, Scott, Kevin, et al: some 700 people gathered on Sunday night to commit unspeakable acts of sing-along and appreciate. Playing in the orchestra, a thrill went through me when the first chorus started, the added sound of the audience filling the cavernous chapel and gym. It was wonderful.
Being someone who wants to keep all the commandments, I need help. I know that if I order something on Friday or Saturday it ships on Sunday forcing people to work. Sometimes when I order on Thursday I notice that it is in transient on Sunday, forcing people at UPS or Fed Ex to work. Sometimes even on Wednesday I see it moving on Sunday. I’m very concerned. However, I also notice if I order on Sunday (which of course was an Ox-in-Mire situation), I notice it did not ship until Monday so no one worked on Sunday. So my question is should we never order from Amazon except on Monday and Tuesday? What if we aren’t sure that it’s in stock? Can we trust that it won’t start moving on Sunday even if we order on Monday? Maybe we should only order on Sunday to be sure that it doesn’t stay in transient for a week? Should as good Mormons we only order on Monday and always pay for two day shipping to be sure it’s not moving on Sunday? I’m very confused. Please help.
Consult your mishnah, Steve.
The fact that you ask these questions demonstrates your TK worthiness, SteveP. If you were CK material, the answers would distill upon your soul as a nice sherry from heaven.
But which TK Scott? I need to know.