LGB Saints at Church: Some Challenges

June 29, 2019 by

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Michael is from a multigenerational Latter-day Saint family but has spent the majority of his life outside of the Mormon corridor. He’s not employed by academia but looks for opportunities to scratch his academic itch.

PREFACE

When the Church retracted the November 2015 set of LGB-related Church policies I felt relief, like taking a breath of air after too much time underwater.  As the news sunk in, one common reaction I saw was would-be allies asking what everyday Latter-day Saints could do to make their LGBT brothers and sisters feel more welcome.

Most of the proffered answers to that question focused on changing doctrine, policy, and teachings.  That is not my answer — or at least, not my starting point.  I intend to adapt the question Neylan McBaine poses in Women at Church: “accepting the doctrines and policies we have in place in the Church today, how can we help improve [LGB]-cooperative practices on the local level so as to relieve unnecessary tensions caused by cultural or historically normative practices?” [Read more…]

Filed Under: Children, Family, Gender & Sexuality, Guest Post, Marriage, Men, Mormon, Women Tagged With: , , , ,

Personal Revelation and Sustaining Prophets

April 6, 2019 by

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Rachel Allred lives in California and loves her husband, her toddler, and ice cream (not necessarily in that order).  She generally tries to make the world a more empathetic place.

I literally started crying in the cab Thursday. It was a Lyft. The driver asked if I was okay; I told him I was.

I knew The Policy was wrong. I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. I felt like death when it was announced. My heart sank. My lungs filled with lead. My mind started screaming. My soul recoiled. I don’t know how else to say it. I was just completely numb.  I walked around in a vaguely ragey, disbelieving fog for days.

That weekend in November 2015, my beloved husband and I (this was back when he went to church; I’ve wondered since if the policy was the beginning of the end) went to a thrift store to buy clothes with rainbow patterns.  We specifically chose a thrift store whose proceeds are donated to LGBTQ support organizations. We wore our rainbows to church that Sunday. We went with subtle patterns. Too subtle, maybe, because we had to tell people that’s what we were doing, but I was playing the organ so at least some people noticed.   [Read more…]

Filed Under: Children, Doctrine & Policy, Family, Gender & Sexuality, Guest Post, Marriage, Men, Mormon, Scriptures, Theology, Women Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Let Love be Love

April 5, 2019 by

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Nicole is a mother, feminist, and activist living in the Salt Lake Valley with her partner Kerstin and blended family of seven. She credits the women in her life for shaping her values and her hope for a world filled with compassion, authenticity, and uncompromising love.

It’s so hard to find any words to express my feelings about the news about the changed policy.

I type and delete and type and delete.

I couldn’t find the right words because I couldn’t find words that were true enough to myself, but that I thought would be safe from hurting or offending my family who are still members.  I love my family very much and they have been so great with Kerstin and me.  Since they’ve been so careful not to hurt us, I really, really don’t want to hurt them.

I think I’d just like to describe my dream world. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Children, Church Programs, Current Events, Doctrine & Policy, Family, Gender & Sexuality, Guest Post, Marriage, Mormon, Religion Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Mormon and/or Gay?

August 20, 2018 by

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Rebekah Perkins Crawford has a PhD in Communication Studies from Ohio University. Her research centers on the ways religious communities communicate about mental health, sexuality, and sexual violence. Her favorite calling at church is the primary chorister and she loves reading, gardening, and exercising in her spare time.

My friend who sings with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir recently told me about his experience performing with the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus on their recent tour in June. A considerate, thoughtful man, he said, “It was great to share the stage with them, to build bridges between our two communities and to show the world that there doesn’t have to be animosity between the Latter-day Saints and LGTBQ folks.”

It wasn’t until later that evening, after our conversation, that I figured out what it was about his statement that had unsettled me. It bothered me that his words assumed that the Latter-day Saint and LGBTQ communities were two separate entities, that “they” were gay while “we” were Mormon. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Church Programs, Doctrine & Policy, Family, Gender & Sexuality, Guest Post, Mormon Tagged With: , ,

Colorful Socks

June 29, 2018 by

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JD is a gay man in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — and he still attends!  
He could still really use a friend there.  His colorful church socks get lonely too. This piece is a follow up to a previous one  Part 1.

Last month, I wrote about my struggles as a gay man in the Church.  There, like everywhere, my LGBTQ friends and I have received numerous pieces of repetitive advice.  As we approach the end of Pride, I want to provide my reactions to some common themes.

Until we consider the real implications of our statements, actions, and policies, we are not prepared to minister to our LGBTQ brothers and sisters.   [Read more…]

Filed Under: Doctrine & Policy, Family, Gender & Sexuality, Guest Post, Marriage, Men, Modern Era, Mormon, Religion, Society & Culture, Theology Tagged With: , , , ,

Step by Arduous Step…

March 28, 2017 by

English, Bahasa Indonesia, Česky, Dansk, Deutsch, Eesti, English, Español, Faka-tonga, Français, Gagana Samoa, Hrvatski, Italiano, and , Latviešu, Lietuvių, Magyar, Malagasy, Nederlands, Norsk, Polski, Português, Reo Tahiti, Română, Shqip, Suomi, Svenska, Tiếng Việt, Vosa vakaviti, Ελληνικά, Български, Монгол, Русский, Українська, Հայերեն, ภาษาไทย, ភាសាខ្មែរ, 한국어, 中文, 日本語.’

The Church has now posted a set of localized materials to their Mormon & Gay resource site. The materials translate the notice which was originally sent to local Church leadership in English-speaking areas of the Church; the Frequently Asked Questions section of the site; the Church Teachings section of the site; and the Same-sex Attraction gospel topics essay.

[Read more…]

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Getting There…

March 21, 2017 by

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LDS Church adds a new video to Mormon & Gay—and it features a family lovingly accepting their out, gay son as he leaves the faith. It’s a welcome addition to the site—and a bold move that, no doubt, took a great deal of work on the back-end to power thru institutional resistance. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Mormon Tagged With: , ,

The Church and Same Sex Marriage: The Pastoral Question

May 22, 2015 by

“God has created me to do Him some definite service; He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another.”—John Henry Newman

aGen2114Dore_TheExpulsionOfIshmaelAndHisMotherUnless everybody I know has misread the tea leaves, same-sex marriage will soon be legal in all 50 states. On the off chance that this doesn’t happen in June, it will happen some time. We have passed the tipping point, and a clear majority of people in the United States now favor such unions. Even in a democracy as dysfunctional as ours, clear majorities usually end up getting their way.

Universal same-sex marriage laws will have consequences for the Church. I’m not talking about the dire parade of horribles at the end of Glenn Beck’s slippery slopes. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Mormon Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Poll: Should the BSA end the ban on gays?

January 30, 2013 by

It could happen. Maybe it should happen. What do you think?

Whatever your opinion, the BSA is gathering feedback. Call 972-580-2330 during business hours, or email nationalsupportcenter@scouting.org. And, as always, explain yourself in the comments.

Filed Under: Mormon, Scouting Tagged With: , ,

‘Shipping Klaine? What Mormons think about Glee

January 3, 2011 by

A few weeks ago I finally yielded to the raves of several friends and gave Fox’s hit show Glee a try. Over the past few weeks, my husband and I have raced through all of Season 1 on Netflix. It’s everything my friends said it would be: funny, charming, musical, a bit campy. What struck me immediately was that amid the knowingness and too-smart-to-be-anything-but-cynical vibe that defines everything in our generation, this show stands out as relentlessly cheerful. I searched and scrutinized for the “we’re being so happy ironically angle,” but my search was in vain. This really was earnestly chipper. Je savais what this je ne sais quoi was: it was high-octane Mormon.

That’s right, if BYU-TV thinks they have a patent on happy-go-lucky “see the good in the world,” it’s past time for their lawyers to initiate a barrage of cease and desist letters to Fox headquarters. Yet the litany of reasons why Glee re-runs won’t be syndicated on BYU-TV anytime soon is lengthy and pointed.
[Read more…]

Filed Under: Gender & Sexuality, Mormon, Pop Culture, Women Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Why I Favor Gay Marriage

May 31, 2006 by

The Church’s recent statement on the proposed federal marriage amendment has spurred threads at M* and a lengthy one (well over 300 posts at the time of this writing) at T&S. A lot of this discussion has focused on the politics of the proposal and the legalities of federalizing the definition of marriage. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Family, Gender & Sexuality, Marriage, Mormon, Politics, Society & Culture, Theology, Doctrine & Policy Tagged With: , , ,